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On
the first Christmas, angels declared Christ’s coming to be a time of
peace and good will on earth. Today, 2000 years later, Christmas for
many persons is anything but peaceful.
One
study found that the average person spends up to an hour and ten minutes
a day during the last week of December bickering over holiday-related
plans.
Shopping often adds to the stress. Part of the problem may be the lack
of planning. It has been estimated that the average shopper spends just
two and a half minutes planning each hour he or she shops and returns to
the same store at least three times. Seventy percent of all clothing
given as gifts will be returned to the store by the one who receives
it.
Instead of being a celebration, Christmas Day for many persons is a day
of exhaustion. In many families meal preparation consumes most of the
day while only a few hours are devoted to relaxation and enjoyment.
So
why do people turn the most blessed time of the year into the holiday
hassles? Why, instead of enjoying peace on earth, will some families
squabble through the Christmas season?
Some
people destroy the joy of Christmas by feeling they are responsible to
see that other people are happy. But no matter what they do, the
persons they try to please just demand more.
These people would have a much happier Christmas if they refused to be
blackmailed by such phrases as “If you really loved me you would…” or
“I’m your mother, you have to do this…” Giving in to blackmailers only
makes the problem greater the next time around.
At
Christmas time, it is important to remember that self-worth is not
determined by pleasing others but by doing what is right. The needs of
spouses and young children should generally be ahead of the desires of
parents, grandparents, in-laws and friends.
One
way to avoid being manipulated by others at Christmas is to decide what
is best for you and your family and then make plans well in advance.
Then when someone tries to send you on a guilt trip, you can firmly but
politely say that you already have plans. Happiness is taking control
of your own holiday schedule.
The
Bible says to honor one’s parents. That often means attending an
extended family function during the Christmas Season.
But
Jesus warned that good relationships, even within the family, cannot be
built on a system of payback. Instead, he says that we are to give to
others “without expecting to get anything back.” (Luke 6:35).
When
we act from our hearts instead of being controlled by others, we set
ourselves free to enjoy a peaceful, joyful holiday season. The key to a
happy, tranquil Christmas lies in our own decision to stop trying to
please and impress the rest of the world and to simply do what is
right.
Happiness is slowing down and reflecting on what the holidays are really
all about: Jesus coming to earth as our Savior.
Paul Jetter, Upper Valley Community Church |
